Skip to main content

The Other Half

How does one live without another half? A question I often ponder.

Being single is very liberating, so they say. They could do whatever they want, whenever they want. They don't need to wait for things to happen, but simply making it happen without needing anybody's permission.

That is true.

For introverts who enjoys spending time alone (but not lonely, there's a difference), solitude is a way to fully focus on (developing) their passion or simply enjoying what they'd like to do. As they say, you don't be an expert in something by 9 to 5 - a lot of effort and time needs to be put into it. And many times, the time to search and find and develop that relationship isn't really on their side.

Take J.K.Rowling for example. She carried on without another half, and eventually become successful. Although she did have a husband before (they got divorced).

We human beings are not created an island, however, how long could we keep that solitude? That need to feel belonged doesn't diminish with time. It's innate in all of us and simply grows out of proportion over time.

Some singles mention that it is not their choice to be, finding the right person at the right time is difficult. In addition, it is too much of a hard work too.

To be fair, it is.

The initial infatuation, the subsequent chase thinking that they're the one, the acceptance, the honeymoon periods, the regret phase, the perpetual woo to keep the relationship alive, the misunderstanding that could make or break the strong bonds, the miscommunication as both grows in a different direction, it doesn't ever seem to end. The effort and time being put into a relationship is similar to building a successful business empire - god knows how long.

But is it worth it?

Yes, because as you grow older, after a while, it got lonely - really lonely if you don't actually have anyone except your family and friends (who might have their other halves).

The most successful people in the world have another halves who know their ambitions, their characters, their lifestyle, but are willing to go (and grow) through it together. Their other halves makes a whole world of difference.

- from the point of view from a girl who has only 6 years of boyfriend-girlfriend relationship

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Virginity Fraud

2 myths of women's sexuality:
1) First time of sexual intercourse is marked by bleeding
2) Hymen will break and be gone foreverThe 2 women, Nina Dølvik Brochmann and Ellen Støkken Dahl, are medical students and authors of The Wonder Down Under, easily demyths the 2 centuries-old belief in their recent sexual education TED Talk: https://youtu.be/fBQnQTkhsq4Briefly, turned out that hymens come at different shapes and sizes, i.e. stretchable, with small, many holes, or large holes in the middle, which makes it impossible to be a measure of women's virginity. How to make a measure out of something that is not a constant? If it is stretchable or sufficiently spacious to allow penis to penetrate through, it doesn't have to break and bleed, and remarked that a woman is still a virgin. Medical professionals have known these for many centuries, but the myths are still prevalent in the societies. Why are these facts not highly publicized? Because it is being used to surpress women i…

2017 Lessons

Receiving the feedback from my boss and my mentor was easy - they are all very positive. Those that are not, they have been work in progress. But I'm going to push my limit further - I'm still not satisfied with where I am now. A few learning points for 2017 (which haven't ended yet - I might have an update) below, however:1) Never be afraid to speak up - be it on a new, more efficient approach on doing things (ofc, research them well first before presenting it), be it saying no and pushing things away (due to lack of capacity and inevitable compromises of quality), be it asking for help (you'll be surprised on how people are happy if you ask for their help as they feel that they're worth much more than they think of themselves). You need to speak up to get what you want. Nobody can read your mind and nobody will know what you want unless you say it out loud. 
Moving forward: Learn to be more tactful. Learn to speak with confidence in front of a few more people th…

Working Tips

Growing up is growing pains. Hurts, but it's necessary to go through. When I first started working, the transition was hard, but I learnt a lot. Here are 3 lessons I found the most invaluable till now. 1) Setting expectations too high. It's true that in order to shine we have to give a 100%, but often times, when we were still young and energetic, we overestimated our measure of 100%. It is usually our 120-150%. Giving this overpowering 100% everyday is not sustainable - eventually you'll reach a burnout point. Reduce what you thought is 100%, not so much, but enough for you to do your job well, make your supervisor happy, and sustain for a much longer period of time. 2) Smile. An often underestimated value in the workplace. Everybody loves people who always smile to them, acknowledging their presence instead of ignoring them. You don't necessarily have to greet them cheerily and ask them sincerely how are they doing (although this is a super good time to practice the …